Optimism

Optimism is not a trait I naturally posse. I naturally fear the worse and a large part of my laziness towards certain areas in my life is my fear to fail. I'm not an optimistic person. Questioning everything can be hard sometimes. Even down to dressing myself. Do I like what I wear? Do I like what others wear ? Is my opinion relevant.  Most of the time I dislike what I wear. You could say I'm too critical or you could say I'm trying to be perfect. Yet all around in the media, in other blogs are beautiful people. It's intimating. I'm Jealous. It's an ugly trait jealously. It leads to a hatred of others and a resentment of everything you have. So I'm trying to be optimistic. Looking at all the good things I have in my life. Doing what makes me happy. So I may not look perfect or act perfect but I'm happy. Well I'm happy with everything but my hair. I just want to do a Britney where I shave all my hair off  but the bald head is properly not going to suit my lumpy head.